Monday Jan 31, 2022

Colors of Life - Nothingness & Numbness

Colors of Life - Nothingness and numbness

We sometimes interchange these terms with how we feel, but they are different. Nothingness is a term in philosophy that is of a higher power (In existentialism, the void is associated with the belief that nothing structures existence. Within this theoretical framework, the nothingness or meaninglessness of human existence is thought to be the primary cause of existential anxiety or anguish. APA Dictionary) I’ve spoken with several people and they have informed me of their feelings of numbness. “There have been moments in my life when I’ve become numb to certain aspects of myself that I found frightening. Or I’ve conformed to certain morals of society and then maybe rebelled or found a way out.” Jessie Buckley. The pandemic has caused much concern about mental health and there are various local agencies that offer help during this time. I have gone through this numbness. In spiritualism, we can view nothingness as positive as a higher existence. (The Indian Vedas say that ‘nothingness’ is the ultimate source of knowledge—the final human frontier beyond which nothing else remains to be known. According to the scriptures, nothingness forms the chassis of ‘somethingness’ in its most subtle form. NatureAsia.com). I find when I go through a period of numbness is when I’ve been overwhelmed by emotions or situations and then the overload makes me feel numb. Coming out of this numbness, I feel a perception/belief has changed. Usually for the better. Situations, titles, and possessions, whichever might be the cause of numbness, are not as important anymore. I then wonder why I have given these things so much of my personal power. Is it what society, cultural beliefs expect from me? I’ve searched the internet for this and couldn’t find any information about what happens after the stage of numbness, except for referrals to therapy. I guess this is such a personal journey that only a therapist or clergy can understand what an individual is going through. I believe in helping ourselves with mind, body, and spirit. That includes therapy.

How do you seek help when there’s a feeling of emptiness/numbness? We’re human and we will feel empty for many reasons. A loss of a person, dream or a change in lifestyle. How do we handle this when you don’t care one way or another? When forcing yourself to take a walk is a chore and you don’t want to do anything? These are questions I’ve asked myself. Is it depression, anxiety, worry? Maybe you’ve also asked yourself these questions. Sorry to say, I don’t have an answer. I could just tell you what I’ve done. I meditated and went to therapy. Meditation might not be for everyone. Prayer might help. “If prayer is you talking to God, then intuition is God talking to you.” Wayne Dyer. Whatever is your belief, work with it during this time. When I first meditated, my to-do list was all that I kept seeing or what I could or should have done. Should’ve, could’ve, and would’ve are not action words. In meditation, I’ve learned to see myself in a safe place-the forest, beach, meadow, my home. This has helped me not focus on my what ifs and to do list.

Know that you have value and you’re good enough. We are all at various stages in life. If you need help, ask for help. You’re worth it. A quote from Rumi “Grief can be the garden of compassion. If you keep your heart open through everything, your pain can become your greatest ally in your life’s search for love and wisdom.”

I’ve listed links in the notes regarding various articles on this subject.

The poem for this week is: Time Passes from Inspire Me: Raw.

Sun caresses

Rosy hues

I flourish

Breeze prunes

Exposed and cleansed

Past stripped away

Layers erode

Float down

Chimes of time

Naked in the wind